Gossip Girl: MARCH MADNESS

Man, when a show goes off the air for a few weeks, I cannot remember any things about it!  Like Gossip Girl. GG hasn’t been on in forever. I’ve started to forget characters. Who is that guy above? Writer, Brooklyn, John Tucker Must Die, Lizzy McGuire, the New Yorker, being an awful person. . . these are all just pieces of a picture that is no longer there.

HOWEVER, the CW released a trailer for the return of Gossip Girl. It’s all coming back to me now.

Whoops, here is the trailer

Let’s talk about this for  a minute

-Serena suggests she and Nate take “this” slow. Take what slow? Haven’t they already done the nudey thing before? Also, the parts with them making out may seem incongruous with her statement but A) that’s the fun of this show! and B) they may be taking it slow. Just some deep kissing, erotic massage, other forms of outercourse.

– “I think that whore may be my mother.” Chuck wins.

-When Rufus asserts, nay, DEMANDS that Lily tell him she didn’t sleep with her ex-husband, I think he is being a little ridiculous. Earth to Rufus, Lily has two children, of course she slept with her ex husband. Twice even! Geez, guy, do you still think that storks drop babies into chimneys and global warming is real? Alright, Rufus, keep being ignorant of life.

-Vanessa is not wearing any underwear. Is it laundry day? Are we to assume she is trying to get a RISE  (you know) out of Dan Humphrey? Is she wearing pants or a skirt? If pants, I think the underwear thing becomes less shocking. If skirt, I think she is playing with  undergarment fire and she might get venereal burned!

-Can we all agree that we hate Jenny’s short prince boyfriend? He punches Nate! Who does that? Also, since it’s a television show, couldn’t they have gotten a taller actor to portray him? It’s not that big of a heigh difference but it is enough to notice and take me out of the magic of the scene where Jenny almost gets felt up by a drug dealer.

– Calm down with this first time specialness spiel, Serena. Are you Jenny’s parents? (Answer: Jenny might be better off with Serena as her parents)

Gossip Girl returns! On a day!

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